Vent Session

Searching for an apartment in New York City is like putting on a duvet cover blindfolded. 

I HATE PUTTING ON THE DUVET COVER! 

(typing that in caps made me feel ohsomuchbetter.)

My lease isn't up until the end of June, but I've reluctantly started the hunt primarily using Craigslist, StreetEasy, and various no-fee/landlord websites. My bf has been extremely helpful, too - I seriously wake up every morning to a new email with links to peruse. (thank you!!)

I'd really, really love to have a separate room/area for living space.

...and a bathroom that is big enough for both a shower and a toilet.

...and ample cabinet space so I don't have to use my oven as storage. 

...and a furniture facelift. 

I meaaan, I'm 26 years old and it's time I have a normal-sized couch. The two bottom drawers of my previously owned dresser no longer open/operate without falling apart. And my "side-table" is a flimsy stand constructed of cardboard that was once used as a pedestal in an off-Broadway production. Let's be real.

Who knows, maybe I won't even end up moving. I have moments where I really do love my set-up and the thought of dealing with the process and packing up my life amidst its current momentum leaves me short of breath. Maybe I won't even find anything "better" in my price-range...but the bug is in my ear and goshdarnit, I'm going to at least try. 

My DVR is always full of two TV re-runs that will never get old:

Sex and the City & Friends.

A 30-minute episode of either is as effective as a professional therapy session complete with Oreos & milk. I often find myself fantasizing about living in either of their homes, frolicking around and having more than two options of where to sit down. 

[yelled into a loud-speaker] 'Scuse me, NYC, I'd like to know where you're hiding those apartments!

Let's take a look at theirs, shall we? 

Here is Carrie's apartment:

images via

(ugh, that closet makes me hyperventilate with envy.)

Here's the same apartment post wedding-drama remodeling:

images via

I know, friend, I know.

 Don't cry.

And don't forget where the gang hangs out:

"I'll. be. there. forrr youuuuuu."

Yeah? Well be there by finding me a big purple living room.

If you witness any irrational aggressiveness / unruly behavior / overall annoyance from the little lady during this process, blame Bradshaw & Geller. As the stress increases, I will be relying on my DVR for support. And you know who lives inside the DVR...people with big, beautiful, & rent-controlled apartments.

Oh gawwwd. I'm going to end up like this chick, aren't I?

until next time,

g